Three Months

Tomorrow will be 3 months since my beautiful baby was born still.  Three months since I held her and kissed her and felt her soft, soft skin and smelled her perfect baby smell.  It was yesterday and eons ago all at the same time.

I saw a baby girl at dinner tonight, she had just learned to walk, she was bouncing at her mother's side.  I could not take my eyes off of her.  My baby will never get to do those things.  I missed her so much at the moment I thought that my heart would break.

We have been planning Grace's memorial, it is tomorrow.  I am scared and nervous and also excited.  Excited that more people will get to know her and see how amazing she was and how much good she brought into this world.

This post is fractured and I cannot figure out how to make it whole.  I feel pretty fractured so I guess that is fitting.