Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Are we losing it?

So things have been going better with Rosabella lately.  She is eating well and sleeping well and generally a much more fun baby to be around.  There were a few weeks there that were just rough, when we came to the realization that our baby cries much more than most, although not like a baby with colic.  It was hard and not very fun and made me wonder how people ever have more than one child?  I now think that just like you forget the discomfort of pregnancy and the pain of labor you also forget the constant crying of a 4 to 12 week old baby.  Here we are just on the better side of the crying and thinking about a third child.  Yikes!  My DH is more the driving force for this than I am, but about 80% of the time I am thinking about another baby.  My cycle has not even come back yet, we may have fertility issues again, but I am thinking about it and even planning for it (not getting rid of baby clothes Rosabella has outgrown, not getting rid of boy's clothes that were given to us in case our third is a little boy, etc).  As hard as caring for Rosabella has been I cry when I think that this may be the only infant I get to sleep curled up with at night, the only sweet baby I get to dress and kiss and watch learn about herself and the world.  Would I feel this way if we had Grace here?  A 17 month old and a 2 month old?  I don't know.  I just know these are the crazy thoughts in my head.

1 comment:

  1. I'm still in the middle of the crazy baby crying, and I'm having the same crazy thoughts! I am AMA, so I know that if I am going to have a third child, I will have to do so quickly. But I do feel absolutely crazy for even thinking about that right now, so I'm really glad to read this post! I vacillate between wanting Gabe to have a living sibling on one hand, and the possibility to give him alone all of my emotional, physical, and financial resources. I don't know how I will be feeling 9 or 10 months from now when I would need to start trying again.