tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3810710399716902196.post4367589257351232062..comments2021-06-13T00:23:52.572-07:00Comments on Shattered Dreams: Deep Thoughts: It's all about the rideGrace's Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15208469231684698972noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3810710399716902196.post-62991958397324236882012-06-02T21:28:49.371-07:002012-06-02T21:28:49.371-07:00I used to feel that way sometimes, before Anna'...I used to feel that way sometimes, before Anna's death more-or-less defeated me completely. All hail to you, if you can keep that perspective at the forefront, Amanda. It strikes me as a moment on the extreme of a continuum - but at least you have it ON your continuum!! Which in and of itself is an enormous accomplishment and strength.<br />My caution would be to allow yourself to travel the continuum, have days that all you want to do is scream for Grace, days that all you want is to be pregnant, days where What Is Today is just fine, and days that allow for a future of fulfillment - with or without children. <br />Deep Thought days are good for replenishing the soul. :)Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14042635150884274413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3810710399716902196.post-39832265535581753812012-05-31T21:02:56.895-07:002012-05-31T21:02:56.895-07:00Amanda, I too, try to live for Eva. It is a hard r...Amanda, I too, try to live for Eva. It is a hard road. I look at my children and think, well, maybe this is it. Maybe we will never have another. What is my motivation to have another baby? Just too have some healing from the wrenching loss of losing Eva or do I really want another. Truth is I don't even know. I know I want want want Eva but I will never hold her again this side of Heaven. Another baby will not be Eva, I do know that. Do I need to be healed? Will a baby help to heal me? Or, really, is it okay that my youngest living child just turned 3 and he doesn't have a little sister. Is it okay to grow old with 3 sons and never have the daughter I desired so much. Okay, this is getting long...so many Deep Thoughts!Emhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11910371746336686970noreply@blogger.com